the 'me'

sobbing.
and.
watching your face
to see if you're holding up
to all that i have to belt out.
can you see?
it isn't about ending up with a fistful of air
it's about watching you go through the routine
and hoping
that you can see what i saw
but you mustn't feel for it
because you needn't.
it hurt,see?

(laughs)

'go fall in love.
go find someone you can be yourself with'
'(laughs)...but that's just the point.i've made friends with the quiet.quiet is the new loud.it's exactly what everyone seems to be running away from these days.i've gotten scarier....(laughs).so then?...'
'go.then you'll choose better things to make a film on'
'yea?and then what? i'll spread the fears and the dreams out for drying and sit back comfortably in my cottage?this is anything but a mate call.sure i want the cottage.but the dream will have to wait.I've already bought the door knob for the front door.it's a wrought iron star fish.
don't tell me to go fall in love.'

what would you do if i sang out of tune

we'll carry on then
in this unworded cloud
no we won't state anything
we'll laugh and dance
we'll stare at each other in the eye if we ever do manage to sit a yard away
the yard is important.
that's when we'll hold the stare
we'll blink
we'll keep looking
till then
you can pass me by
and i'll let you
time won't stop
we'll become the walking dead
you will be a breathing memory laughing for real in front of me
and i will marvel at having the same questions
every bloody time.

breathe.
the words fade away further

off the grid.

one small step
i'll cover you
just step over the edge and on to the parapet
one step around the pillar
i'll cover you,it's just the one step around the pillar
don't look down
i'm here
you're covered.